Archive for April, 2008

Got Milk?

Wednesday, April 30th, 2008
When the milkman read the note he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 1.5 gallons, so knocked on the door to clarify the point.The blonde came to the door and the milkman said, “I found your note to leave 15 gallons of milk. Did you mean 15 gallons or 1.5 gallons?” The blonde said, “I want 15 gallons. I’m going to fill my bathtub up with milk and take a milk bath to make me more attractive.” The milkman replied, “Oh, OK. Pasteurized?” The blonde looked at the milkman with a confused look on her face and said…”No. Just up to my boobs.”

Defining Confusion!

Wednesday, April 30th, 2008
Q: How do you define confusion??A: A blind lesbian in a fish market!

Three Larry’s

Wednesday, April 30th, 2008
Three ladies are sitting in a bar. All of them have husbands named Larry. One lady asks, “If you could name your husband after any soda pop, what would it be?”The first lady thinks for a minute and says, “Moutain Dew, because he can mount and do me anytime.”The second lady thinks for awhile and finally says, “7-Up, because he has seven inches and can always get it up.”The third lady thinks for a long time and finally says, “Jack Daniels.”The other ladies look at her with a confused look and say, “Wait a minute, Jack Daniels is a hard liquor.”The third lady says, “Yep, thats my Larry!”

Thor the God of Love

Wednesday, April 30th, 2008
THOR, the God of Love wakes up the morning after the orgy.As he sits up, stretches and looks around, he sees a beautiful, shapely, young blonde standing in the doorway.He walks over and says – “Good morning, I’m THOR”!She looks back at him with blue eyes and a comely smiles and says – YOUR THOR…I’M SO THOR I CAN’T PITH!

One-liners for kids.

Wednesday, April 30th, 2008
Q: What goes TICK-TICK, WOOF-WOOF?A: A watchdog!Q: Why do male deer need braces?A: Because they have “buck teeth!”